My dad has been having a difficult time lately. I know he has been frustrated with needing to have help, and he has been so impatient and grumpy since his surgery. I can understand how he feels because I HATE that people have to help me. I just don't think he always realizes just how grumpy he has been. There is nothing worse than the feeling of not being able to do things for yourself anymore. It is not everyday that it is like that for me. I still have days where I am fine to do things for myself. Each day is different, but on those days where things are bad and I just can't do anything and I just have to ask for help, that is the worst feeling in the world. So I get how he is feeling, I really do.
Anyway, I finally lost it and just told my dad that I understand just how it feels. It was not that long ago that I was able to go to school, work full-time, and live the life that I had planned for myself. Even with this illness, I planned to continue living that life. I DO understand how he feels right now, the difference is that in a few weeks, he will go back to being able to do everything for himself. My life will continue on this roller coaster ride until the day that a better treatment plan or cure is found.
His reaction to me was quite surprising. He said that there is not a day that goes by that he does not blame himself for what is happening to me. What??? That is Crazy!! Yes, he is my father, Yes, he feels responsible for me, just as I feel responsible for my son. That is not what he meant.
My father served in Vietnam and was exposed to Agent Orange during his tour there. There has been a lot of debate regarding the health problems that have come from the exposure of these chemicals. My dad says that MS is listed, along with the many other health problems that both me and my sister have had. I would be curious to know if anyone else's parents served in Vietnam and were exposed to the chemical Agent Orange. Could there be a connection between this exposure and the diagnosis of MS and various other illnesses? I am not sure.
I do know that it is NOT my fathers fault that I have MS, have had cancer, asthma, or any of my other health problems. I also believe that there is a chance that I may have had these illnesses even if he had never been exposed to this chemical. No one really knows what is to have happened, and we can't change that. I do know that it is NOT his fault, he was only doing the right thing by serving his country. For that I am VERY proud of him.
I would be interested in finding out however if any of you have parents who served in Vietnam, and if so, if they were exposed to this chemical. Who knows maybe there is some connection. I am so sorry that that all of these years my father has been carrying around this guilt, thinking that he is responsible for the health problems that my sister and I have endured because of his honor and duty to this country. He is a wonderful man, father, and husband. I am so very blessed to have him in my life.
I leave you with a little tune from 1969.....
Take care. I hope you are all well.
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11 comments:
Hiya, I am not to sure about the agent orange link to ms...I know noone in my family history has been involved in the Vietnam war but maybe it could be a global effect of the orange hell that we created. Interesting for sure! Might be worth looking into! Great choice on the music frount nice to see and hear!
Hope you are well
Dave
x
my parents were just babies when I was born in 67.....14 and 18.
BUT, on and interesting note I have a cousin with brain tumors on my mother's side and a cousin with MS on my father's side. I have both the brain tumor and MS and am also the eldest.
I love Clearwater!!!!
Hmmmm ... no AO here either, but lots of MS in the family tree.
i know nothing abnout the AO but about the MS i know a bit...LOOK INTO THE SWANK DIET
hi. i just read your blog and i would like to say that i know 2 people who served in vietnam and have developed multiple sclerosis. as far as i know, at least for these 2 people, their ms is related to agent orange exposure.
I was wondering the same thing- my dad has severe dementia, served in the war in Vietnam, and I was diagnosed with MS- thinking there may be a connection........
My father served in Vietnam and was exposed to Agent Orange...I have been diagnosed with MS for 3 years now with no prior family history at all. Is there anything there can be done.
My family and I were exposed to Agent Orange chemicals via Fort Detrick, MD. There is a class action lawsuit going on now. You can look it up online under "Fighting for Frederick". One of the illnesses caused by Agent Orange is MS. Any type of auto immune illness.
I have two daughters, both have MS. Their father was exposed to agent orange in vietnam. Is there some kind of study of children of vets that were exposed to this chemical? I only have these two daughters, it seems unusual that they would both have it.
I am a Viet Nam vet that worked on the aircraft that sprayed Agent Orange. I was drenched in the chemical on a regular basis. My daughter was just diagnosed as having MS. Unfortunately there is little known about the disease, cause or cure. They, the VA claim there is no link between the two. May God bless all that have this disease and hopefully someday a cure will be found
Ted Heckert
my dad served in vetnam and was exposed to agent orange.1 year ago i was dx with ms and now my sister is being dx with ms.i think there is a link.
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